you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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