She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize