Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
