so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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