We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Randomize
