I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize
