He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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