He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
