I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
