i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
