so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
