I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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