Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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