I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
