Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
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