I puked a lego.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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