Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
