Me too!
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
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