We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
