3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
