Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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