I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Are we still banned from the library?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
