i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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