The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
