This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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