I feel like abortions should bother me more
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
