But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
