My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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