is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
