Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
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