We need to start having sex underwater more often.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
