I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
