do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
