Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
