just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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