i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize