i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize
