I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
