There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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