Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
can u get pink eye on your cock?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
