But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
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