what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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