I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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