i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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