I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
4 words: hood of his car
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Randomize
