I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
it's like iHOP with fire
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
