I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
