I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Randomize
