Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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