she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
